*You might be a liberal if ...
* By Chris Grawburg - You might be a liberal if:
* you%26#039;ve ever left your sociology class thinking, %26quot;That professor
really knows what he/she/it is talking about.%26quot;
* you associate the words %26quot;model American%26quot; with %26quot;Bill Clinton%26quot;
* you think Dan Rather represents media impartiality
* your response to anything Rush Limbaugh says is, %26quot;Well, he%26#039;s fat.%26quot;
* the first word in the description of your hair color is %26quot;neon%26quot;
* you%26#039;ve ever tried to protect the ozone layer
* you%26#039;ve stood for animal rights, but wear leather belts and sandals
* you%26#039;ve ever given a dollar to a bum so he can buy more liquor
...ummm ... food
* you ever use the words %26quot;Clarence Thomas%26quot; and %26quot;Uncle Tom%26quot; in the
same sentence
* you are a vegan
* you have a bumper sticker that says %26quot;You Can%26#039;t Hug With Nuclear
Arms%26quot; on your car
* you believe diversity represents the extinction of the white race
* you%26#039;ve ever walked around carrying one of those Javah mugs
* you pay a 185 percent markup for organically grown food
* you cheered for %26quot;Obstructing Justice Simpson%26quot; last Tuesday at 1 p.m.
* you don%26#039;t think it%26#039;s right to kill rapists and murderers, but do
think it%26#039;s right to kill babies
* you have anything to do with the Compassionate Living Fair
* you want more funding for AIDS research but less for cancer,
despite the fact that cancer kills many more people per year
* you have the entire menu at Cup-A-Joe memorized
* you consider yourself open-minded but refuse to listen to anything
Jesse Helms has to say
* you abhor censorship unless it%26#039;s censoring race, religion,
Conservatism, Western culture or Rush Limbaugh
* you found yourself unemployed after this past November%26#039;s election
* you%26#039;re a dope smoker or a womanizer ... oh, sorry, that%26#039;s %26quot;You
might be a Clinton cabinet official if ...%26quot;
* you%26#039;re the dolt who stole the %26quot;Helms %26#039;96%26quot; bumper sticker from my car
* you think the phrase, %26quot;... separation of church and state%26quot; is in
the Constitution
* you cry, %26quot;You can%26#039;t legislate morality,%26quot; but defend the Roe v.
Wade decision in order to legalize your moral position on abortion
* you stay informed by watching MTV News
* you have an %26quot;I%26#039;m Straight But Not Narrow%26quot; button pinned to your
book bag
* there is a ring in any part of your head other than your ears
* you think religion is bad for school kids to learn, but think
condom giveaways are just what schools need
* you molest campaign workers, then lie about it on national
television . . . oops, my mistake again, that%26#039;s %26quot;You might be Mel
Reynolds if . . .%26quot;
* you think Jesse Jackson is a good spokesman for the black community
* you think Jesse Jackson is good at anything
* you lie in bed at night worried that Pat Robertson might be out to
get you
* you attribute the rising illegitimacy rate, crime rate or problems
in the inner city to Ronald Reagan
* you%26#039;ve ever held up a grocery store line trying to pick between
plastic, which isn%26#039;t biodegradable, or paper, which cuts down
innocent trees
* you think the National Organization for Women is made up of
average heterosexual women with no lesbian agenda
* you%26#039;re on the committee to construct the Gay Jewish Women%26#039;s
Cultural Center -- there%26#039;s a slight chance you%26#039;re a liberal
* you blame Ronald Reagan and George Bush, but not the spend-happy
%26quot;Democrooks%26quot; for the huge national debt
* banning assault weapons is your solution to end crime (what do you
mean punish the criminals?)
* you tell me how to live by telling me I can%26#039;t tell people how to live
* And finally ...you think Ted Kennedy is sober and monogamous.
You might be a liberal if....................?
*You might be a liberal if ...
* By Chris Grawburg - You might be a liberal if:
* you%26#039;ve ever left your sociology class thinking, %26quot;That professor really knows what he/she/it is talking about.%26quot;
[I%26#039;ve met some who DID.]
* you associate the words %26quot;model American%26quot; with %26quot;Bill Clinton%26quot; [Nope, he wasn%26#039;t a model American, but better than many I%26#039;ve met.]
* you think Dan Rather represents media impartiality
[No media figure who gets paid to read news does so impartially, they are all mouthpieces of the organization that pays them. This applies to ALL of them, not just Dan Rather.]
* your response to anything Rush Limbaugh says is, %26quot;Well, he%26#039;s fat.%26quot; [Mine is generally, he%26#039;s a pompous blowhard, a drug addict, and a liar, but, he HAS had his moments... I listen, and then make my own decisions.]
* the first word in the description of your hair color is %26quot;neon%26quot;
[It actually was at time... Neon Lagoon Blue from Punky Colors...]
* you%26#039;ve ever tried to protect the ozone layer [I think this should be a responsibility for all of us.]
* you%26#039;ve stood for animal rights, but wear leather belts and sandals [I only allow for %26#039;animal rights%26#039; for a certain degree... I disagree with the way foie gras is made for example, but a burger I can deal with...]
* you%26#039;ve ever given a dollar to a bum so he can buy more liquor ...ummm ... food [I%26#039;ve known a few people who were down on their luck... been homeless myself once... this one is a judgement call... not everyone is there because they are buying booze or drugs... just have to watch for the signs and go with your gut...]
* you ever use the words %26quot;Clarence Thomas%26quot; and %26quot;Uncle Tom%26quot; in the same sentence [That would be demeaning to Harriet Beecher Stowe. She was trying to educate, Clarence Thomas is trying to show the world the way to black superiority...]
* you are a vegan [See the aforementioned comment about burgers...]
* you have a bumper sticker that says %26quot;You Can%26#039;t Hug With Nuclear Arms%26quot; on your car [Well, you can%26#039;t. I don%26#039;t have this on my car, but I DO agree with the sentiment...]
* you believe diversity represents the extinction of the white race [Diversity doesn%26#039;t represent the extinction of the white race... the government giving business tax breaks to hire minorities rather than qualified candidates DOES...]
* you%26#039;ve ever walked around carrying one of those Javah mugs [Huh...???]
* you pay a 185 percent markup for organically grown food [Rarely, the wife supports organically grown because it is also locally grown and keeps the money in our community rather than sending to whatever state the supermarket is based in, as well as being pesticide free and healthier...]
* you cheered for %26quot;Obstructing Justice Simpson%26quot; last Tuesday at 1 p.m. [We don%26#039;t watch TV so I never saw it...]
* you don%26#039;t think it%26#039;s right to kill rapists and murderers, but do
think it%26#039;s right to kill babies [I support the death penalty and think we should have a limit to the number of appeals... I also support Roe v Wade and think it IS a womans right to decide, up to a point, after that, it is no longer a choice...]
* you have anything to do with the Compassionate Living Fair [The what...?!?]
* you want more funding for AIDS research but less for cancer, despite the fact that cancer kills many more people per year [I don%26#039;t think we are likely to find a cue for either one... an inoculation against HIV maybe someday, but I don%26#039;t think we will ever have a cure for either of these, and I think if you believe it you are as guilty of playing God as the people you are criticizing...]
* you have the entire menu at Cup-A-Joe memorized [Nah. We prefer Starbucks.]
* you consider yourself open-minded but refuse to listen to anything Jesse Helms has to say [Tht%26#039;s because Jesse Helms is a moralizing, self-important, bigoted ******]
* you abhor censorship unless it%26#039;s censoring race, religion,
Conservatism, Western culture or Rush Limbaugh [I was a US Army soldier, I have defended your right to NOT be censored, no matter what my personal feelings... As to my personal feelings, I am against censorship for adults, they can make their own decisions, but until you are an adult, I believe your parents can and should censor what you are exposed to within a degree of reason...]
* you found yourself unemployed after this past November%26#039;s election [I did, but that was because the industry I was in downsized and laid off people, it actually had nothing to do with the elections...]
* you%26#039;re a dope smoker or a womanizer ... oh, sorry, that%26#039;s %26quot;You might be a Clinton cabinet official if ...%26quot; [Could be, but has Bush done any better...? I think not... I%26#039;d rather have 4 more years of the %26#039;dope smoking womanizer%26#039; thanks...]
* you%26#039;re the dolt who stole the %26quot;Helms %26#039;96%26quot; bumper sticker from my car [Not me. As noted above, I support your right to free speech, no matter how assinine your speech may be, and I feel you can speak away... as an adult, I don%26#039;t have to listen, I CAN just walk away...]
* you think the phrase, %26quot;... separation of church and state%26quot; is in
the Constitution [Actually, I think there is a passage that refers to it, but not in those words... I%26#039;d have to look it up...]
* you cry, %26quot;You can%26#039;t legislate morality,%26quot; but defend the Roe v.
Wade decision in order to legalize your moral position on abortion [You CAN%26#039;T legislate morality... people will either have it, or they wont...]
* you stay informed by watching MTV News [Again, I don%26#039;t watch TV of any sort... OK OK, cartoons on Saturday with the kids, but that%26#039;s it...]
* you have an %26quot;I%26#039;m Straight But Not Narrow%26quot; button pinned to your book bag [Nope]
* there is a ring in any part of your head other than your ears [I%26#039;m male and have one in my (left) ear, does that count...?]
* you think religion is bad for school kids to learn, but think
condom giveaways are just what schools need [Yes I do. I don%26#039;t think the school should teach religion, I think the parents should... Hell, there are so many different faiths let alone different forms of the same faith (several schisms in the Catholic church come to mind), that it should be up to parents to teach their faith to their children... I also disagree with handing out condoms in schools because I feel that it sends the wrong message to kids that it%26#039;s ok to have sex at their age... but then, I support it at the same time because I know that by this point the kids will do it without the condoms if they are not available... another breakdown from parents who didn%26#039;t teach their children...]
* you molest campaign workers, then lie about it on national
television . . . oops, my mistake again, that%26#039;s %26quot;You might be Mel Reynolds if . . .%26quot; [No idea what you are talking about on this one]
* you think Jesse Jackson is a good spokesman for the black community [Never has been, never will be]
* you think Jesse Jackson is good at anything [Fund raising, self-agrandizement, and stirring up **** are off the list then...? He%26#039;s good at all three of those...]
* you lie in bed at night worried that Pat Robertson might be out to get you [You mean he%26#039;s not...?]
* you attribute the rising illegitimacy rate, crime rate or problems in the inner city to Ronald Reagan [To a degree... mostly I blame parents for not teaching their children better... but Reagans programs that drove things to a point where both parents had to work outside the home to make ends meet didn%26#039;t help matters any...]
* you%26#039;ve ever held up a grocery store line trying to pick between plastic, which isn%26#039;t biodegradable, or paper, which cuts down innocent trees [Nope, I just take whichever they give me, I have uses for both...]
* you think the National Organization for Women is made up of average heterosexual women with no lesbian agenda [Not made up of, I think there are all sorts there, but I do agree there seem to be more %26#039;femi-Nazi%26#039;s%26#039; there than anywhere else...]
* you%26#039;re on the committee to construct the Gay Jewish Women%26#039;s Cultural Center -- there%26#039;s a slight chance you%26#039;re a liberal [Ok. You got me on this one... that would be nuts...]
* you blame Ronald Reagan and George Bush, but not the spend-happy %26quot;Democrooks%26quot; for the huge national debt [I will point out that AFTER Bush Sr left office there was a debt that Clinton balanced and turned into a surplus in 4 years. After Clinton left office BUSH Jr has turned that same surplus into a greater national debt than ever before AND led us into a false and illegal war... I will continue to blame Reagan, and both Bush%26#039;s for what they have done wrong...]
* banning assault weapons is your solution to end crime (what do you mean punish the criminals?) [I think we need to do both, and anyone who says they NEED an assault rifle for hunting is a liar, and anyone who says they NEED one for protection is an idiot...]
* you tell me how to live by telling me I can%26#039;t tell people how to live [See my above comments on freedom of speech. You can tell me how to live all you like, I will ignore you all I like.]
* And finally ...you think Ted Kennedy is sober and monogamous [Chappaquidick... Need I say more...?]
Reply:All of that is funny and...........true!!!
Reply:hmm...I actually do over half of these...guess I%26#039;m a liberal!
Reply:Oh that sucks I%26#039;m a liberal then.
Reply:You might be a fool if... you set up a bunch of straw men, push them over, and declare yourself triumphant.
skin care
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